Truth be Told
When I was a child many people had their own opinions about who I was. To some, I was the smart, friendly, caring girl. To others I was the fat, four-eyed girl with frizzy hair. It was a tough pill to swallow when I heard myself described as the latter. I wish I would have known the truth about who I was because it would have saved a lot of years of self-hatred and feeling like I was unworthy of love
I wandered through most of my life unsure of who I was and believing other’s ideas about who I was. Not just who I was physically, but who I was as a person. Most would say I was too sensitive, and I would take on that identity. Some would say I was spoiled, and that is who I became. I had no idea about who I truly was. I believed the lies and succumbed to the defeat these lies brought with them. I had a strong yearning to belong and so badly wanted to be loved. The problem was I didn’t know how to love myself nor did I know someone loved me more than I could ever imagine.
In 2007, I started attending church regularly and joined a women’s Bible Study. The study was on our identity in Christ. This was the first time I really started reading the Bible and learning the truth about who I was. I learned that:
● I am a child of God (John 1:12, NIV)
● I am complete in Christ (Colossians 2:10, NIV)
● I cannot be separated from the love of Christ (Romans 8:35-39, NIV)
● I can do all things through Him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13, ESV).
These truths transformed me, they made me want to learn more about God and why He loved me so much, and for the first time in my life, I felt like I belonged.
During this time I also learned about the Armor of God and how important it was to put on all the pieces of the Armor—this includes the belt of truth (Ephesians 6:14, ESV). The belt of truth and the sword of the Spirit (the Word of God) have been vital to reminding me of who I am. They help me stand tall in my faith and against the lies that the enemy would have me believe. When I feel like the enemy is getting the best of me, I turn to prayer and my Bible to reaffirm the truth of how much God loves me. It’s not always easy, so when I have moments where I feel like I can’t get back to the truth, I reach out to my prayer sisters and ask them to pray with me and for me. It’s important to surround yourself with people who can point you back to God’s truth or who can speak God’s truth to you.
I still have days where I struggle and think of myself the way people described me as I child. During these moments, I immerse myself in worship music, my Bible, and prayer. I also fasten my belt of truth and ask God to remind me of who I am, that I belong, and most of all, how much he loves me.
Stephanie Patterson is originally from Denver, Colorado, and has called Las Vegas home since 2013. She has been married to her incredibly supportive and patient husband, Gabriel, since 2008. Her blended family includes 3 children – 2 adult children living productively on their own (hallelujah!), and a spunky, creative pre-teen who keeps her on her toes. Stephanie became a mother at a young age, and in her late 30s, is finally figuring out who she is. What she has discovered about herself, thus far, is she loves to read, write, cook/bake, and nap. What she has always known is that her heart belongs to God, and she feels called to connect with people who need help seeing that God loves and accepts them as they are. Stephanie is looking forward to sharing her life experiences and hopes to connect with others through the grace and glory of God.